SITE

SITE


-So Rubens, you excited?
-Super excited. It took so long to finish,
huh? -Six months.
-Sites are slow to make. People think you can create one
in a jiffy, but no. We gotta grind a lot. Even the hosting
was complex. -But it’s okay?
-Now it’s got a good, safe structure and a clean, modern layout. -Easy to navigate. You’ll love it.
-Perfect. -So, shall we dive right in?
-Let’s go. Great. It’s down the street.
Let’s go. This is the home page. I went
with our minimalistic concept, not a lot of info. Only a couple of plants
to tie the cold floor together. Wait a sec.
Where’s the site? You’re right in it. Cézar, I think you
mixed things up. I asked you to host the website
for my Japanese restaurant. Let’s leave the feedback
for the end. I know you’re eager, but there’s still
a lot to see. This is where you sign up.
Sandra helps you out. She deals with the bureaucratic
bits, filling forms and stuff. Elerson here takes care
of the mailing lists, new menus,
he posts everything. And he’s a postman? I loved that word you created,
“newsletter”. We even included it. But officially, he does “general
services”. I’ll send you his info… Wait, I gotta pay
these people? Rubens, wait, we’re just getting
to the good stuff. I don’t think you understand
what I asked. There you go!
I know menus are very visual, so I made this
contemporary art thing. 25 oil on canvas paintings
for the cold dishes. For the salmon dishes,
I put some graffiti art by this collective
from Recife. It’s a totally different vibe,
y’know? What’s this music playing? I know you banned auto playing
background music, but I couldn’t resist. DJ Perereca. He’s played
with me in Taquara for about 15 years. Great playlist.
He plays in Lapa, too. So I thought,
“Let’s keep the audio on beta.” Hey, I didn’t ask for that. That’s a pop-up window.
It’s required. -Pop-up?
-Hey, kid! -Got gold?
-No, thanks. He’s a pain, keeps showing up.
But he helped out a lot. He carried wood, concrete,
sand bags, did the mixing. But c’mon,
we’re not done yet. This is a more
institutional area. This is Valquiria. Got a degree
in Tourism and interned at MASP. She does the guided tour
for the people. So they can learn more about
the restaurant’s history. -Old photos of yours.
-My brother…? We get to know Rubens
and how he started all. She also mentions
workplace gossip, it’s a hit. This little space here
is called “Rubens’s Blog”. I made it up. Here’s the gist:
you come here every day and write about anything
your brilliant mind comes up with. Then you post it
on the wall. People come to read
and be updated. I’m kinda confused here. With what?
You didn’t like the interface? It’s ceramic tiling,
great user flow. Are you a web designer? -Of what?
-Are you a web designer? -I’m not following.
-Web designer. -A designer?
-Of websites. -If I’m a designer…?
-Of websites. Sites in the web! Please, Rubens, I come from
an analog, handcrafted era. I’m old school. -It’s artisanal…
-This doesn’t work for me. -How come?
-I already got a restaurant. I got a brick and mortar place,
I just needed a virtual one. -Nah…
-You gotta be online nowadays. Online? That doesn’t exist, it’s
a word made up by mainstream media. It’s like global warming,
there’s no such thing. Hey. Do you do webhosting? What? This is Snap,
a friend of ours. -He’s adorable.
-This is what I need. He gave food for the workers,
he paid for transport… Damn, incoming hack! Hey, you parasite!
Did you leak my nudes? So let’s talk
about this thing. -It’s looking great.
-Don’t you want some curtains? Maybe you could frame the room
with them. Put a Greek column in the middle
to divide them. It looks pretty easy to use. Y’know what? You could put this mat
that lights up underneath. Put some nice mandalas. It looks perfect to me.
You can upload it. We could varnish the hardwood.
I know this dude. You gotta do it. What? It’s already up?
Did you register the domain I asked? By “domain” you mean like
a property deed? Well, I was just gonna tell you
it’s really… Hey, what the fuck? This domain is private property,
buddy! Let’s go, let’s go,
let’s go! -Fuck off!
-See him later, alligator!

100 comments

  1. Video plano para mentes planas. Nem humor nem verdade, só exagero para pobres de raciocínio. Supostamente intelijegues.

  2. Parabéns. Fez eu procurar HOSTGATOR no google e se um dia precisar de site acho que vou lembrar disso.

  3. Putz, cansei do porta dos fundos.
    Agora todos os videos sào propagandas disfarçadas…. tem esse, o do miojo e deve ter mais que eu nào vi.

    Era muito melhor antes, vai ver por isso que a audiencia veèm caindo.

  4. Gostaria de conseguir rir, pra dizer q gostei desse humor moderno e antenado, até meu ego ter uma ereção, mas tá muito fraco ta pior q Zorra total

  5. pena que a propaganda é da hostgator.. oh hospedagem ruim… Só não é pior que a Godaddy! oaskpoakpsoaks

  6. Video ta daora até, mas pqp, todo video tem merchand, parece q fica forçado. Critica construtiva ai

  7. Da hora que o Porta dos Fundos (a pedido da Host Gator, com certeza) apagou todos os comentários que criticavam a empresa. Sou cliente HG e o serviço vem piorado a cada dia. A CENSURA é uma prova disso 😀

  8. How To Build A Website With Hostgator | HostGator Reviews Personal

    https://youtu.be/87G1JmjqTFo

  9. quando você pensa que o porta ta uma merda, ai vem um video desse e renova a sua esperança.

  10. Hostgator é a única que nunca me f***. Já perdi cliente grande pela merda da Bluehost e da KingHost, a pior de todas.

  11. O número de vagas de emprego que tornou-se dispensável com a tecnologia dos sites. Puta critica foda !!

  12. Na hora que ele falou "DJ perereca" eu tive que fechar o vídeo porque não aguentei KKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK

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